1. Smoker's rights

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2. Quit Smoking. Quit Drinking. . . And Don't Get Angry. It Can Lead to Heart Disease

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3. He Said There Was Nothing Left to Issue a Warning About!

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4. Koop retirement bash with skim milk and mueslix

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5. Surgeon General C. Everett Koop Retires--Let's Party!

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6. Warning: The General Public Has Determined that C. Everett Koop is One Big Royal Pain

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7. If Anything Comes in the Mail from the Surgeon General, Don't Open It!

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8. I Take It the Surgeon General's 'AIDS' Pamphlet Came Today!

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9. Red Meat. . .Salt. . .Booze! Obviously, This is a Suicide!

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10. I Keep Hearing This Voice That Tells Me 'Don't Do This. . . Don't Do That. . . You'll Be Sorry!'. . .

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